Word to the CIA: Waterboarding's for sissies. If you really want to get those terror suspects to spill the falafel beans, tie them to a tree outside the Lincoln County Courthouse and make them listen to Mariah Carey caterwauling Christmas carols over the loudspeaker.
Directly across the street, we at The IJ have been subjected to this extreme torture for several days, and we're ready to reveal our computer passwords, our PINs, the Pentagon go codes, anything.
Just make it stop!
The constant blare recalls the U.S. military's use of rap and rock to flush out Manuel Noriega after the 1989 invasion of Panama. Mr. Noriega couldn't take it anymore and surrendered.
The FBI blared progressively more irritating music while trying to flush Branch Davidians from their armed compound in Waco, Texas in 1993. The Dividians set themselves on fire.